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Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relationships. Show all posts

Winning An Argument With Your G-friend

The basic rule for coming out on top in a dispute with your significant other — don’t be a jerk. Here’s how to keep yourself in check.



You are going to get into it with your significant other every so often. It’s no fun for either party, but as a man, I’m willing to concede that it’s even less fun for men. Why? Because women can express their emotions like it’s nobody’s business. And guys? Not so much.

And since women already have the upper hand, I thought it only fair to share a few tricks to help you emerge victorious from battle … or at least with fewer scars than usual.

Don’t Tell Her to “Relax”

There is nothing more inflammatory than the r-word. Especially when it’s flippantly thrown in the face of a woman who is already on her last good nerve. And since it’s impossible to rationally discuss an issue with a red-eyed, fire-breathing dragon (which is pretty much what I turn into whenever a guy says that word to me), I urge you to avoid this expression and any variation of it — settle down, take it easy, etc. — at all costs.


 

Talk In the First Person

Instead of saying something like, “You don’t appreciate me,” try, “I feel like I’m not being heard when …” or “I don’t feel appreciated when …” It may seem like a small thing, but sentences that start with “I” sound much less accusatory than ones that start with “you.” And when your girlfriend doesn’t feel like she’s being verbally attacked, she’ll be more open to hearing what you have to say. And that may even lead to her apologizing. Maybe.

Leave Your Friends’ Opinions Out of It

Every woman’s greatest fear in life, aside from dating an axe murderer and the possibility that her daily non-fat latte actually contains lard, is getting stuck with the “crazy” label. So even if all of your buddies think that she’s being totally ridiculous for demanding expecting you to do something like text her while you’re hanging out with them, she doesn’t need to know they think she’s nuts. A) They’re your friends, so of course they’re going to have your back. B) Telling her will only make her feel awkward around the friends you name the next time she sees them. And C) It’s guaranteed to drag your argument into overtime — and that severely damages your chances of coming out on top.



Don’t Make Empty Threats

The United States of America does not respond kindly to threats, and neither does your girlfriend. So if you give her an ultimatum —“Unfriend your ex and quit following him on Twitter or we’re so done” — you better be prepared to follow through. Women are nasty mental ninjas who will call your bluff, which will either force you to follow through and leave, or back down with your balls in hand.

Fib If You Need To

File this tip away, because if you don’t need it soon, you’ll definitely find use for it down the road. When a woman gives you the stink-eye and hisses, “You don’t even know what you did, do you?” Lie. Nod your head, and ask her if she wants to talk about it, or if she needs time to cool off. It’s like those “Need a moment?” Twix commercials — she’ll be so caught off guard by your response that she’ll falter, giving you a few precious seconds to rack your brain, identify your offense, and get a stronger game plan in order.

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Open Relationships...

Persuade Her To Have An Open Relationship

  • Better Man in brief ...
  • For an open relationship to work, both parties have to be keen on the idea.
  • To sell the concept, you need to focus on how she will benefit.
  • Make sure she knows it is only about sex, as emotional infidelity is more of a concern for her.
"Often, the best sexual communication occurs outside of the bedroom..."
You make her No. 1, but you don’t want her to be the only one. Open relationships offer sexual variety with other people, which immediately sells you on the idea, but what about your girlfriend? Having an open setup could result in the relationship breaking up. Hey, some relationships just don’t make it once they’ve tried the open road. If you have breakup on your mind, perhaps ending the relationship is your best bet rather than suggesting you widen the playing field a little.

However, if you want to keep your relationship a priority in your life, but you just want to have some new experiences, perhaps you’ll be one of the lucky ones who finds that bringing outsiders into your relationship will add some spark to it.  It’s good to bear in mind that for an open relationship to work, both parties have to be keen on the idea. When trying to awaken your girlfriend’s interest in open relationships, here are some ways to go about it.

1- Plant the idea

Instead of focusing on your needs, let her be introduced to the idea of open relationships in a more objective way. During a hot night together, why not suggest renting an erotic movie or two? Choose movies that involve threesomes and try to find quality porn that has a bit of a story line if possible, especially since a huge chunk of erotic films out there are not always liked by women. (Note: Avoiding porn that features facials or other acts she’ll view as degrading is also a must.)
Watching a steamy flick together won’t only add some spice to your sex life now, but it could also make her turned on by what she sees, thereby planting an idea in her mind that she might want to take further.

2- Encourage the fantasy

Now it’s up to you to encourage her wildest dreams. Often, the best sexual communication occurs outside of the bedroom, so take some time to share your erotic fantasies with your girlfriend and let her do the same. This is a great way to nurture trust in your relationship, but it also encourages her fantasies to become reality. For instance, if she tells you that she has previously fantasized about sex with another person, hear her out and encourage her to describe it to you. Once her mind is open to the thoughts, her body is more likely to follow.


"Find the good things that an open relationship can bring to your lives."

3- Hang out with swingers

Taking things to the next step can involve hitting some swingers’ clubs to meet swingers who are fun, young females. Your girlfriend will see that the act of meeting and picking up swingers is definitely not the same as asking someone out on a date. There’s no trying to get swingers interested in who you are; rather, it’s all about having a sexual experience and then moving on to others. Period. This is sure to put your girlfriend’s mind at ease: Swinging is carefree and noncommittal. You leave your emotions at the door while gaining sexual stimulation.

The bonus? There’s no guilt of going behind your partner’s back or betraying them with your cheating ways because it’s all out in the open.

4- Sell the benefits

One of the biggest mistakes men make when suggesting an open relationship to their girlfriends is that they focus on what they want and completely forget that she has to be on the same page for it to work.

But if a salesman is going to sell you a new body lotion, he’s not only going to tell you what its benefits are, he’s also going to show you how it’s better than the current one you’re using. So, when discussing open relationships with your girlfriend, focus on how the change to your relationship can benefit you both more than your current setup. For instance, she can still reap the benefits of your current relationship, but she doesn’t have to feel sexually limited; she can take that career opportunity overseas without carrying the emotional baggage of the relationship. Find the good things that an open relationship can bring to your lives. If she sees this for herself, she’s more likely to become interested in giving it a try.

5- Make it about sex

It has been said that when it comes to infidelity, women are more likely to have emotional affairs whereas men focus on the sexual satisfaction. This backdrop of information shows you the glaring truth: Often, women will associate sex with something more emotional, or they think that sex will lead to love. This could be the undercurrent that is preventing your girlfriend from wanting an open relationship as her fears could include the thought that you’re going to be falling in love with the new women you’re sexual with.

be open

You have to nip this one in the butt, guys. Ensure she knows your relationship is the sexual and emotional priority -- the main act. All extras in the movie are there for purely sexual adventures. If you keep the emotional stuff out of the equation, she will not see it as a threat, and the good times can keep on, er, coming.



Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships
The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
Redefining Our Relationships: Guidelines For Responsible Open Relationships
Love Unlimited: The Joys and Challenges of Open Relationships
Eyes Wide Open: Avoiding the Heartbreak of Emotional Promiscuity


 

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#1 Reason To Hide The Remote

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Lust Secrets



10 Types of Women We Secretly Lust Over

If you ask a guy to describe the perfect female, what he says isn't necessarily going to look like the women he ends up lusting over. (Case in point: the over-inflated silicon balloons that grace so many porn stars' chests aren't likely to be part of the description.)

Sexual attraction is a mystical voodoo, and we often secretly want to be with those whose body types and personalities are not considered ideal -- and sometimes those that are considered taboo. While it's been pretty well established in pop culture that, from a young age, guys are always lusting over teachers, friends' mothers and cousins, we've come up with 10 other types of women that we pine for a little more discreetly.



1. Bodybuilders

Most women who strut around in very little clothing look dainty and breakable. But the female bodybuilder is showing you what she's got while daring you to give her everything you have.




2. Ladies with slight dental imperfections
Perfect teeth are aggressive to the point of being off-putting. But a generally well-put-together set of chompers, which includes a noticeable gap or a tooth (or two) that are slightly out of line? Now that's hot.


3. The freckled
Any grown woman who can pull off a face full of freckles is a stark reminder of all the girls we had a crush on -- and never did anything about -- in fifth grade. This is also true of grown women with braces, but those things can be really dangerous if your lusting is successful.



4. Extreme and outspoken members of another political party
Hatred and lust are both very passionate emotions. So every time we hear the shrill voice of a woman whose politics we abhor, we can't help but want her a little bit more.





5. Goth chicks
Sure, you were into the socially sanctioned sexy cheerleaders in high school, but it was the girl in the Bauhaus T-shirt and liquid eyeliner who secretly invaded your nighttime fantasies.




6. Pregnant women
There is something very sexual about a pregnant woman and all of her crazy, raging hormones. Plus, you know that whatever happens, you're not going to get her pregnant.




7. Bitches
The more unpleasant and demanding a woman is, the more we want to sunny up her disposition the old-fashioned way.





8. Geeks
We're not talking traditionally hot women who play geek for fame or attention, but rather the rare female computer programmer or engineer. If a lady knows her way around those kind of complex but logical systems, it would seem like she'd be a wiz when it came to our simple, but logical, needs.



9. Chubby girls
Whether they admit it or not, most guys think those extra 10 lbs. make a woman look approachable, real and, well, cuddly.








10. The really religious

Think purity rings. Kelly McGillis in "Witness." Hell, even chicks in burkas. Anytime there is a potential reservoir of smoldering and untapped sexuality, our penises take notice.

Tell us your secret types in the comments. We promise not to judge.



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Divorce : Strategies & Tactics

A simple tip that will quickly and easily prevent your wife from hiring the best divorce lawyers in town – you’ll be amazed – and extremely grateful – when you read this amazing tip!

The biggest mistakes you can make with your divorce lawyer – and how to avoid each of them and save yourself thousands of dollars in the process!

The tax implications of a divorce settlement – and how to ensure you get a tax break instead of a big tax bill in the spring!

How to win a divorce without ever even having to go to court – these tips could save hundreds of dollars in court fees!

How to get a great divorce settlement faster than you ever dared dream possible – and while spending less than you could ever hope for!

How to dramatically lower your alimony payment – or even get rid of it all together!
And much, much more!






CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFO

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Divorce : Protect Your Finances

Going through a divorce is not only a very traumatic experience but can prove to be a very costly one as well.  In fact because of the stresses and worries of getting everything sorted many people don’t realize just what a strain divorce proceedings can place on their credit rating.  Although the courts may have said that your partner is to continue paying a debt that is outstanding the lender may decide that it is you that is liable and not them.

Below we offer some Divorce Tips for men – protect your finances during divorce proceedings and so you will not be faced with the added worry of not having enough funds to live on yourself.

1.     If there are any debts which are in both parties’ names then these should be immediately paid and cleared.  If you are unable to pay off the joint debts immediately ask for the accounts to be frozen by the lender so that no more debt can be run up by either of you on them.

2.     If there are joint credit cards then these should immediately be cancelled and each person should arrange to get cards in their own names instead.  However, if you happen to be just a named user on your spouse’s card then ask for your name to be removed from it.  Sometimes the divorce can be a little less acrimonious and your spouse may decide to take revenge on you by running up some very large bills on the credit card and for which you will then be liable.

3.    Unless you have already agreed for the sake of the children that your spouse will remain in the family home then it is best if it can be sold.   In most cases where children are concerned the wife will be provided with the opportunity to stay in the family home as long as she is willing to take on the mortgage payments if able to or if you are willing to continue making the payments for her until the children are old enough to leave home.   However, if your spouse is unable to arrange a new mortgage then the only sensible option is to sell the property and then divide the proceeds between you.

4.    If you have any vehicles then each one should be registered in the name of the person that will be using that vehicle.  Also if there are any payments to be made on these vehicles then arrangements should be made for the person who the vehicle is registered to, to make them.

5.    Should you find yourself in a situation where you are unable to make payments through illness or loss of work whilst the proceedings are taking place, immediately contact the creditors.  This way you can work out an arrangement to make payments when able to and so prevent you from ending up with a bad credit rating.


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Divorce : How To Win



While going through a divorce, not only are men faced with the problems of their ending marriage, but they also have to deal with the stress of winning the Divorce Settlement and getting what they want out of it. It can be very difficult to come to an agreement that both you and your wife are comfortable with, but knowing a few tips can make a huge difference in settling an agreement.

The key to winning your settlement is to get a good lawyer. They do not have to be the most expensive lawyer, but they should be able to explain all legal terms to you and make sure you understand everything that is going on. They should most definitely be trustworthy, know how Divorce Settlements work and be capable of negotiating a settlement that is in your best interest. You should aim for a lawyer who has had experience in this field before.

It is very crucial for you to be prepared in order to win the Divorce Settlement agreement. All documents and paperwork pertaining to shared assets during the marriage should be kept on hand because more than likely they will be needed. Make sure you have all documents that will help prove any point you try to make in court. Not being able to provide proof for something that happened during the marriage will result in a settlement agreement that may not be what you were aiming for. Another reason why documentation is critical is that if your spouse says something against you, you can prove them wrong and clear your name.

As soon as you realize your divorce is going to need a Divorce Settlement agreement, you will not want to do anything against your ex-wife. Do not do anything irrational, such as bad mouth her in front of anyone, including your children, because it will definitely hurt you in the end. During the judgment you will have to account for everything. If your ex-wife shows documentation for something wrong that you did, your case will be less credible. In regards to joint bank accounts, make sure you keep receipts and dates of all the money that was taken out to show as proof in case your ex decides to lie about taking money out of the account and accuse you of taking more than you did. If you are without documentation, there will be no way to prove yourself.

A lot of men out there do not know these helpful tips and end up with a Divorce Settlement agreement that is not in their favor. It is crucial to make sure you are educated about winning your settlement and all the steps necessary to end up with the best possible settlement.

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Divorce : Preparation

It is a known fact that about fifty percent of marriages end up in divorce and the overwhelming majority of these divorces are initiated by women. The court favors most women because they are seen as victims, but by properly Preparing for a divorce, you can actually succeed.

The first step in Preparing for a divorce is to make sure you get a good lawyer for a good price. You should know that your lawyer doesn’t care too much about you at all, and is for the most part, just after your money, so try to find a good family law attorney who you can trust. Collect all of your financial documents because they will be needed later on. Avoid arguments and fights with your wife, because this will only hurt you. Keep your family and children out of the issue. Going through a divorce is a tremendously stressful time so try not to take your anger out on the people who are there to help you.

The second step in preparing your divorce is filing. Your family law attorney will file the divorce case along with financial and other documents with the court. You should focus on your needs as well as the needs of your children. It can be easy during a time like this to forget about your mental and physical health as well as the health and well being of your children. Keep in mind that you will always be a father to them so it is just as important to prepare them.

To get your own mind away from the sometimes tedious divorce process and try to find time for yourself. Find a new hobby, try new sports or go to the gym to vent steam and free your mind. You also have to work on your finances. Make sure you have the funds necessary for the duration of the divorce as well as the possible outcomes. Set goals for your finances after the divorce and try to be realistic about it. Mentally preparing yourself is extremely important.

The third and last step is the after-divorce phase. Make sure you keep detailed records of your financial separation. Transfer ownership of any assets that are being handed over. Close all joint credit cards and bank accounts, and make equitable arrangements for paying joint bills that are still left after the divorce. Another important thing to remember is to keep your emotional divorce separate from your financial divorce. Although sometimes it may seem very hard to do so, it would be beneficial for you to keep these two areas separate from each other.

The last thing to do after your divorce is to realize that it is finally over and that you do have to get on with your life and try to make the best of things. If something may have worked out to your disadvantage, don’t fret about it, but in order to make sure that does not happen, you must be prepared.




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Divorce : Don't Lose Everything

Going through a divorce is extremely stressful and can cause much anxiety. Especially as a man, the odds are against you when dealing with finances and your children. When the idea of divorce first comes up, you will want to start planning and getting all financial records in order as well as anything else that may be needed. If you go into a Divorce Settlement unprepared, you risk getting divorced and losing everything.

There are many tips available on how to get divorced and not lose everything, so as soon as the possibility of divorce arises, you may want to look into these tips and put them into action.

The first thing you will want to do is get a good lawyer. Your lawyer should be someone you trust and who is looking to help you come out on top. Going through a divorce can get very expensive and so, your lawyer should know how protect your finances and guide you through legal processes.

Any joint bank accounts or mutual assets need to be taken care of. If you have credit cards in both your names, you may want to consider building credit on your own. It is very important that you keep records of all transactions made because it is very possible for your wife to accuse you of taking more than your share and without proof, you may end up losing all money you have invested.

Do not go into a settlement thinking your wife is not ready and you will win everything through luck. Having a successful Divorce Settlement requires you to have all legal papers in order to prove all money and finances. Although it can be difficult, you may want to keep in contact with your with wife to know what is going on. You will be able to better prepare yourself as well as protect your assets and things you have invested in through the marriage.

Although you will not want to end all communication with your wife, it is a good idea to keep your finances private. If you receive any private mail, you may want to think about getting your own mailbox or forwarding it to another address to protect it from falling into the wrong hands. It is important to still maintain a good relationship during a divorce because it may result in you losing more than just finances. If you have children, the last thing you will want is to lose all custody and have your children taken away.

Going through a divorce is without a doubt difficult and you will want to do everything in your power to make sure you do not lose everything. The most important thing you can do is be prepared and this cannot be stressed enough. You must save all documents as proof of what has been going on so you do not leave yourself open to the possibility of losing money or even your children.


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10 Things Men think Women like...

You are trying your hardest to make a good impression. You act in ways you think she'll like and you tell her what you think she wants to hear. But somehow, even your best efforts backfire.

Sound familiar?

Indeed, many guys behave in certain ways toward women because they think it will help their cause. They cry and profess their love to score a few extra points. But in fact, when taken to the extreme, these supposed "women-friendly" behaviors are sometimes the very things that will annoy her the most.

The following is a list of 10 such offenses that men commit regularly. They are all behaviors that women supposedly like, but unfortunately, they are often used in excess. So don't let your relationship go sour because of some petty misconceptions. With a quick read of the list below, you should have a clear idea of what to do -- and perhaps more importantly, what not to do -- in order to get her and keep her.




1. You call her too often

Why it will work against you: Incessant dialing is a major faux pas if you want to keep your dignity. It not only makes you look obsessive and dependent, but it can downright annoy her. If you are always on the other end of the phone, you lose your aura of mystery and independence that can be so intriguing.

What to do instead: For every two to three times you call her, she should be calling you at least once. Because of the old-world rules of courtship, you will inevitably be calling more often, but you should still make sure the calls are going both ways. Also, don't call during work hours or on Friday or Saturday nights.

2. You cry

Why it will work against you: You've heard time and time again that she wants a sensitive man, so you open the tear ducts every time she's around. Wrong. Crying makes you look too emotional and needy, possibly even unstable. She wants to be with someone who has an aura of strength and the capacity to protect her. But if you are constantly crying, your manly image is gone. Not to mention the annoyance factor: If you cry in public, she could be embarrassed, and that's the worst offense you can commit.

What to do instead: Unless something very tragic happened and your tears are genuine, ditch the crying act. Being sensitive to her needs is important, tears are not.

Smooching in public, always letting her decide and more relationship-busting offenses

3. You give her too much PDA

Why it will work against you: Rule No. 1: Never do anything to embarrass her publicly. And serenading, ogling and smooching her in public might do just that. Not only will she consider breaking up with you over it, she might also get pressure from friends and family to do so. The last thing you want is a bad rep with her crew as being possessive, cheesy or just plain silly.

What to do instead: Some women do indeed like a certain degree of PDA, but walk that line with care. Start with a peck in public and judge her reaction before proceeding to the public serenade.

4. You use baby talk and try to be cute

Why it will work against you: It is cheesy, kitschy, silly, nausea-inducing. Need I say more? Baby talk is for babies, so don't do it to her.

What to do instead: You are allowed to have the odd pet name and cute inside joke, but leave it at that. Unless she baby talks to you first and gives you a strong indication that she likes that kind of thing, do yourself a favor and ditch it entirely.

5. You are too accommodating

Why it will work against you: Yes, it's important to let her pick the movie once in a while. But if you are watching Dirty Dancing for the 11th time, you have a problem. While you need to be accommodating to some extent, you don't want to appear spineless. In particular, don't ask her permission to do things; that produces a mother-child dynamic, which is surely not what she is looking for in a relationship.

What to do instead: Take your spine back and show her that you are capable of making a decision. Pick the movie, the restaurant or the television show once in a while. After all, that's the basis of compromise -- sometimes she decides, sometimes you do.


6. You are too close with her family and friends

Why it will work against you: While she wants you to be friendly with her family and friends, she doesn't want you to jump the gun either. Especially in the early stages of a relationship, she'll want to make sure things are working between the two of you before bringing her family and friends into the mix.

What to do instead: Your relationship with her family and friends is something that has to develop over time. Be cordial and friendly, but don't go planning her brother's birthday party if you've only been together for a month.

7. You groom excessively

Why it will work against you: A woman generally doesn't want a man to spend more time grooming than she does. But perhaps more importantly, too much grooming will take away from your rugged, relaxed sex appeal. And believe me, that's so much more sexy on a man than a manicure.

What to do instead: Make sure you are clean and smell good, but ease up the facials and manicures; your sex appeal will skyrocket.

Use "I love you" sparingly, chill on the dance floor and lay off the constant chattering

8. You profess your love for her prematurely or too often

Why it will work against you: I know you probably think that the way to a woman's heart is through an "I love you." And you are not completely off base. But such a declaration made too early (or too often) will only freak her out. Not only that, but it puts you in an awfully vulnerable position if she doesn't say it back.

What to do instead: There is a time and place for everything. Don't say it because you think it will impress her; only say it when you mean it. And please, limit yourself to saying it a few times a week.

9. You "overdance"

Why it will work against you: Do you say things like, "I love to dance," or, "Let's go dancing tonight"? When she wants to leave a nightclub, do you find yourself saying, "Just one more song"? If you commit any of these offenses, then you are most certainly are overdancer. You are the extreme opposite of the "I don't dance" kind of guy and you are risking not being taken seriously. She might think you are avoiding buying her a drink or conversing with her at the bar. If all that is not enough, consider this: An overdancer tends to be smelly and sweaty by the end of the night.

What to do instead: Don't look so eager. She'll want you to dance some of the time, but you don't have to always be the instigator. Try to judge when she wants to dance and initiate dancing only half of the time. And don't forget to take breaks to buy her drinks.

10. You talk constantly

Why it will work against you: You might be a great talker, but if you can't be silent with her sometimes, then you need to listen up. Your incessant blabber is bound to annoy her sooner or later. Scratch that; it's probably already annoying her.

What to do instead: Although you've been taught to think that women like men who can talk and share, it goes both ways. Make sure you leave the floor open for her to talk too. Ask questions and don't forget to listen. And remember: sometimes silence is golden - watch what you do.

It might take some time and mental adjustment to rid yourself of these stereotypical notions of what women like. You've probably been told from birth that she'll like it if you sing to her accompanied by a six-piece band.

But the key here is moderation. You don't have to abandon any of the above behaviors entirely; just keep them low-key and you'll be fine. It's like with any good diet: Moderate all of the above behaviors, and every once in a while you can splurge on a public kiss without blowing it entirely.

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Valentine's Day Ideas



It is that time of year again, Valentine's day. Either a time to be happy in a relationship, or cursing all couples and love. Well, we have some suggestions for either situation.

Valentine's day is a special day once a year, when those in love are supposed to pay special attention to the one they love. The holiday is basically created by Hallmark, but who cares, it is great to spend a day and focus on your relationship and enjoying a day together. If you new and just beginning a relationship the pressure to find the best Valentine's day gift, can be stressful, but there are always a few simple gifts that work. Perfume and jewelry seems to be topping the Valentine's day gift list, so if you have no other ideas check the list and give some of the ideas a try.

If you are trying to come up with fun and unique ways to spend the day together, there are plenty of options. In fact many restaurants offer special Valentine's Day dinners. So if you have a favorite place you might want to check that out. If not, check this life of the best Valentine's date ideas. There are many great ideas on that list, I actually plan on using some of the suggestion found there this valentines. Just make sure whatever you do that both you and your partner will be having fun. On a special day like this there is no reason that you both shouldn't be happy.

If you aren't currently in a relationship don't worry we have some thoughts for non couples as well. Valentine's day can be rough if your single, and not always the easiest, luckily there is a list of Valentine's Day Ideas for Singles, to help you through the stupid commercial holiday.


Hollywood Exoticwear The Lingerie Store

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Keep Your Female Friend and...

How To Keep Your Female Friend And Your Girlfriend



Having a female friend can bring many good things into your life. You can go to her for inside advice when the inner workings of your girlfriend’s mind are making you crazy. You can spend the evening with her when you aren’t in the mood for testosterone-fueled competition. She will be there for you when you need someone to talk to. Unfortunately, having a woman as a friend can also cause plenty of discord -- especially in your relationship with your girlfriend. How can you maintain a friendship with someone of the opposite sex while preserving the harmony in your romantic relationship?

Defensible female friends

There are some girls that you can have as friends without your girlfriend being able to justifiably complain about it. She might grumble about it, but she’ll have no ground to stand on. These women include those you were friends with before you got together with your girlfriend and those who are clearly in happy, stable relationships of their own. She also shouldn’t have a leg to stand on if she tries to bitch about a female friend that you are obviously not attracted to physically.

Female friends that are tougher to defend

On the other hand, there are some women you might want to have in your life that are understandably unacceptable to your girlfriend. If you have fooled around with your female friend in the past, it’s not difficult to see how that might bother your girlfriend. Ditto for the girl who has a questionable reputation. If your female friend has been known to go for attached guys, your girlfriend has a right to be suspicious. Finally, if your girlfriend genuinely dislikes your female friend -- for reasons other than the facts that she’s a girl and she’s friends with you -- you might want to take her opinion into account.

What you can do with your female friend

There are some activities you can do with your female friend that shouldn’t be threatening to your girlfriend. Your girlfriend will feel much more comfortable with you going out for drinks if you do it guy-style. Don’t go to a quiet wine bar where the atmosphere is romantic; instead, take your female friend to a loud pub and pound back some beers like she’s just one of the guys. As far as conversation topics go, talking about your mutual past with your female friend is allowed, but try not to do it too much in front of your girlfriend or she’ll start to feel left out. Take part in hobbies or interests that you and your female friend have in common and that your girlfriend isn’t into. It’s always a good idea to keep your time spent with your female friend in a group situation or at least in a public place.

Are sleepovers OK? Find out what you can't do with your female friend next...

What you can’t do with your female friends

In order to keep your relationship with your girlfriend steady and trouble-free, there are some activities that you should never do with your female friend. No. 1: absolutely no sleepovers. It doesn’t matter if you’re drunk, if there’s a storm outside or if she needs company after a breakup, there is no reason you should spend the night at your female friend’s house -- even if you sleep on the couch. Also, avoid date-like, full-evening plans (like dinner and a movie) in order to keep the atmosphere platonic. You should never choose to spend special occasions like holidays with your female friend instead of your girlfriend. Acting as a fill-in date for your friend for a wedding or office party is also a no-no. Basically, there shouldn’t be any aspect to your interactions that could force people to assume you’re dating.

Venus and Mars as friends

Men and women have many differences, but that shouldn’t stop us from being friends. A friendship between a man and a woman can be just as platonic as the ones you share with your male friends -- but it does require a little extra attention to make sure everyone involved is comfortable with the situation. You don’t have to give up your girl friend just because you have a girlfriend. Just be honest and aware of their feelings and you should be able to have the best of both worlds.

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When She Treats You Like A Child


Somewhere on the long list of things men don’t understand about women is a woman’s tendency to treat her man like a child, which usually happens at the first indication of a committed relationship. During the casual dating/courtship phase, she may be independent, flexible and accommodating, but as soon as you’re committed, a switch flips in her head and she turns into your second mother and treats you like a child. There are benefits to this transformation (nurturing affection tops the list), but there are also drawbacks, like nagging and lecturing.

Ultimately, this mother/son dynamic can be the death of a romantic relationship: The person you have sex with should not remind you of the person who gave birth to you. So, how can you nip her motherly behavior in the bud and get back to a loving, equal partnership? Read on to learn what to do when she treats you like a child.

Her maternal instinct

As much as some women would like to fight against their inherent biology, they were made to bear and raise children. When women don’t have children of their own, they tend to project all their nurturing instincts toward the closest person in need, which, in this case, is you. Not all women are destined to or even want to be mothers, but most women have the capacity and even the drive to take care of something or someone. When this comes in the form of making you soup when you’re sick or listening to your troubles after a long day at work, it is most welcome. When it results in repeated requests for you to cut your hair already or pick up your bloody socks, it may bring out the teenager in you.

What to do: When she treats you like a child, you can counteract the negative results of her maternal instinct by acting like a man. She is less likely to think of you as a child if you regularly demonstrate that you are strong, independent and self-sufficient.

Her mother

The deciding factor when it comes to whether your girl’s care-taking tendencies come out as the over-bearing, nagging mother complex or the soft, caring mommy incarnation is what kind of mother she grew up with herself. Women tend to carry on the traits they learn from their mothers, no matter how hard they may try not to -- and when she treats you like a child, this isn’t always a good thing. This doesn’t mean that you’re destined to be with the mirror image of your potential future mother-in-law (and if she’s a real bat, you have our pity), but chances are good that your girl has picked up at least a few of her tricks. On the other hand, if her mom is warm, open and bakes you cookies, you should marry that girl immediately because that kind of mother-in-law is few and far between.

What to do: If your girl is starting to display the negative characteristics she has learned from her mother, point it out to her. If she is one of the many women who doesn't want to end up like her mother, this should be enough to set her straight. You could even agree on a quick code word that you can use when she’s throwing a mom fit, like referring to her by her mom’s name.

You asked for it

Naturally, another potential reason for her to treat you like a child is because you’re acting like one. It’s no secret that women mature faster than men, so you and she may not be on the same page when it comes to maturity levels. You may want to pull a teenage rebellion fit when she tells you there isn’t enough money in your budget to buy a PlayStation 3, but keep in mind that the more you act like you’re 12, the greater the chance she’s going to pull out her mom look and stare you down.

What to do: Act your age and the nagging should subside. If you can rationally explain your behavior or desires, do so. If, however, you can’t come up with any adult reason for them, just cut it out.

Looking out for you

Whether it comes out as nurturing or nagging, in most cases it comes from a place of genuine affection. If she didn’t care so much about you she wouldn’t bother to lecture you on how much fast food you’ve been eating. Just remind her, calmly and without a confrontational attitude, that you are an adult and fully capable of making your own decisions. Add that you very much value her advice and appreciate her help and you’ll earn major relationship brownie points in the process. Sometimes her reminders are genuinely helpful; try to see them for what they are and don’t overreact.

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Most Sensitive Spots & More

To spit or swallow

I enjoy giving oral sex to my boyfriend but I hate swallowing. I want to please him but he says it feels better when I swallow. Why is that? Does it really feel any different than when I spit? What should I do?
~Kristy

Kristy,

The reason your boyfriend wants you to swallow is because of the level of acceptance associated with you swallowing his ejaculate. If he sees you swallowing, he will feel like you enjoy going down on him and you're not just doing it to make him happy. Although this will not change the physical feel of the orgasm, it will affect him on a mental level. It is also visually arousing for the man to watch a woman swallow something that came out of him.

I always advise people not to do things they don't enjoy. Instead of spitting right away, which signals to your boyfriend that you find it disgusting, let it be in your mouth for a few seconds. Let it erotically drip out of your mouth, or head over to the bathroom and dispose of it. Whatever you do, don't spit it out of your mouth as if it were poison.

Another way to work it out is to have your man ejaculate somewhere else on your body. If he sees how much you enjoy that, he will begin to enjoy that more than you swallowing. Try to keep an open mind and have a good attitude about it. That will lead to pleasures other than swallowing.

Male sensitivity

What is the most sensitive part on a man's body? Our first anniversary is coming up next week and I want to do something to drive my boyfriend crazy!
~Amy

Amy,

Ask your boyfriend what he really likes and watch his reactions to everything you do to him in bed. Giving him what he enjoys might be more important than knowing where his most sensitive spots are.

To answer your question simply; the place with the highest density of nerve endings on a man's body is called the frenulum. The frenulum is found on the underside of the penis, just behind the head. Approach this area with caution, as many men report that it is so sensitive that they don't enjoy too much direct stimulation. Most men prefer a gentle lick or tap.

If you really want to please your boyfriend, pay close attention to his reactions and have him tell you or show you what he wants. The fact that you care so much and are trying so hard to please him will go a long way.

Saying I love you

I've been dating this woman for three months, and I told her last week that I have fallen in love with her. Her response was far from what I expected. She told me that she would like to continue as friends and not more than that. According to her, she doesn't have strong enough feelings to accept me as a lover, and cannot be with me if my feelings have gone that far. She says she wants to stay close friends and doesn't want to lose me as a friend. What should I do? Should I wait around and hope she changes her mind or let her get away this easily?
~Danny

Danny,

I think you've done all that you can. She obviously loved your attention and to her, you were a challenge. Now that she knows you have fallen in love with her, the challenge is gone. It could also be that she is not ready for this type of commitment and got scared off.

Pursue other friendships that may turn into something more. I don't think she is going to accept you as a lover anytime soon, so you shouldn't hesitate to pursue others in order to fulfill your needs. Also, she may miss the attention you gave her if you move on, so who knows what may happen in the future. What I can tell you is that it would be a waste of your time to hang around hoping she will reconsider.

Gold diggers

I am 36 years old. I own my own business, I live alone and I am financially secure. I think I have met the right woman for me, except for a few things. She has a job, but lives with her parents, has no car and claims she is broke and in debt. I usually pay for our dates, which I don't mind. She never wants to discuss her financial situation. My worry is that if we live together, I will be paying for everything. I don't want her freeloading off me. What do you think?
~Paulie

Paulie,

While I always say not to judge people based on material things such as money, this is different. If she still lives with her parents, has no car and still can't manage her expenses, something is wrong. Be wary of a problem with credit card spending, gambling or drugs. She will be nothing but a financial burden to you. She needs to get her act together and you should stay away until she does.





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Convince Her To Have A Threesome

Today's tip is for those couples that are willing to try new things and are very secure within their relationships. A threesome, if done correctly, can provide couples with a creative new way to explore their inner carnal desires.

So, you'd like to coax your woman into getting naughty and nasty with a third party? It could be an extremely difficult goal to attain. However, if your woman is very open-minded and sexually explicit, initiating a threesome can be a very simple task.

Threesomes aren't for everyone

First off, if your significant other isn't a very sexually open-minded individual, then it's quite unlikely that she'll be bringing another woman home any time soon. For instance, if she doesn't accept you ejaculating in her face, swallowing, or worse yet, giving fellatio altogether, then we suggest that you don't even bother suggesting the idea of a threesome.

If you do broach the topic and she's less than enthusiastic about the idea, then it's likely that you'll end up having your own little threesome for some time to come -- you and both of your hands. After all, if she refuses to let in you in anally, why in the world would she accept another woman in the boudoir?

Sorry guys, but some women will simply refuse to get involved in a situation that they believe is a potential threat to their relationship. If you know your girl well, then you can probably predict whether or not she'd be delighted with the idea of licking another woman's privates, or better yet, watching another woman lick yours.

Double your pleasure

For the rest of you who are pretty sure that your women will be keen on the idea of bringing another sexy vixen into the bedroom, here's the lowdown on how to bring up the idea.

Before anything, remember that you shouldn't act overenthusiastic, otherwise your girl might feel like this is your way of saying, "I want to cheat on you -- with your permission, of course." No matter how you bring it up, make sure that your girl knows that she is what matters most.

Gradually begin discussing sex and sexual fantasies. Put your fantasies out on display so that she can get an idea of what you like. When you begin discussing the date for three, don't say something like: "I've always wanted to bang two chicks at the same time!" You should know what to say and the repercussions of being part of a threesome.

Load the lesbian lingo

Instead say something like: "I would love to see you kissing another woman." This will flatter her and she won't feel threatened or as though you're dying to get into another woman's pants. This way, you get the bonus of joining in at some point once they're into it. If she's open to the whole "lesbian experience", then she'll concentrate more on the excitement of being with another woman, rather than "my man wants to have sex with another woman."

Your objective here is to make her understand that you do not want another woman (even though that's probably the furthest thing from the truth), you simply want the experience of two women.

Now, if you're lucky enough to have the opportunity to set something like this up, she obviously has to be the decision-maker on who the other woman will be.

Oh, and a word of advice for the oblivious at heart: Don't, we repeat don't push for someone considerably more attractive than your woman. She will only feel insecure and renege on the whole idea and once again, you'll be left with the "hairy palms" ordeal.

Three may be a crowd

The following are the potential repercussions that may come with engaging in a threesome:

  • You're left out: It's possible that the two women may be getting off on each other so intensely that they'll forget you're even in the room. Believe us, it happens more often than you think.
  • You lose respect for her: After the experience, it's possible that she may move from being the "girl I'm going to marry" to the "party girl." There are chauvinists amongst us and when we see a girl doing questionable things sexually, we habitually judge and condemn them for it. Blame it on years of evolution, or a lack thereof.
  • She plays for the other team -- permanently: Some women are into the whole aspect of being with another woman, but sometimes the woman may decide that she actually prefers the bush rather than the snake.
  • She becomes extremely jealous: Depending on how things go, your woman can become very jealous because you either paid too much attention to the other woman or the other woman paid too much attention to you.
  • You become extremely jealous: Because you may get left out of the entire tryst altogether, you may become jealous due to the fact that you were neglected.
  • Your relationship disintegrates: It's possible that you or she will realize that perhaps there's someone out there who is better suited to your needs -- at least sexually speaking.
Well, there you have it: a nice and easy way of attaining what you want through cunning means. Remember that there may be some serious repercussions following the ordeal so make certain that this is what you really want.

Until next time, remind your woman that all good things come in threes!


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